- “It's very common! How am I the first guy you've met called Jones?”
- — Jones
Private Jones was a Blue Team Simulation Trooper assigned to Outpost 28-A "Rat's Nest". His fellow troopers continuously mispronounce his name as "Joh-en-nis", to his great annoyance. He was slain when he released Private Caboose from the brig, presumably by Caboose.
- Another Jones character appeared in Season 7, this one preferring his name to be pronounced the way this Jones character's name was always pronounced.